Sunday, January 24, 2010

SHMILY

I try to remind my husband how much I love him every single day.  One of my favorite quotes is...

"Unless it's mad, passionate, Extraordinary love, It's a waste of your time. There are too many mediocre things in life Love shouldn't be one of them."

I left him a little note in the pocket of his coat today...it read "SHMILY."

SHMILY

My grandparents were married for over half a century, and played their own special game from the time they had met each other. The goal of their game was to write the word “shmily” in a surprise place for the other to find. They took turns leaving “shmily” around the house, and as soon as one of them discovered it, it was their turn to hide it once more. They dragged “shmily” with their fingers through the sugar and flour containers to await whoever was preparing the next meal. They smeared it in the dew on the windows overlooking the patio where my grandma always fed us with warm, homemade pudding with blue food coloring. “Shmily” was written in the steam left on the mirror after a hot shower, where it would reappear bath after bath. At one point, my grandmother even unrolled an entire roll of toilet paper to leave “shmily” on the very last sheet.


There was no end to the places “shmily” would pop up. Little notes with “shmily” scribbled hurriedly were found on dashboards and car seats, or taped to steering wheels. The notes were stuffed inside shoes and left under pillows. “Shmily” was written in the dust upon the mantel and traced in the ashes of the fireplace. This mysterious word was as much a part of my grandparents’ house as the furniture. It took me along time before I was able to fully appreciate my grandparents’ game.

Skepticism has kept me from believing in true love—one that is pure and enduring. However, I never doubted my grandparents’ relationship. They had love down pat. It was more than their flirtatious little games; it was a way of life. Their relationship was based on a devotion and passionate affection which not everyone is lucky enough to experience. Grandma and Grandpa held hands every chance they could. They stole kisses as they bumped into each other in their tiny kitchen. They finished each other’s sentences and shared the daily crossword puzzle and word jumble. My grandma whispered to me about how cute my grandpa was, how handsome and old he had grown to be. Before every meal they bowed their heads and gave thanks, marveling at their blessings: a wonderful family, good fortune, and each other.

But there was a dark cloud in my grandparents’ life: my grandmother had breast cancer. The disease had first appeared ten years earlier. As always, Grandpa was with her every step of the way. He comforted her in their yellow room, painted that way so that she could always be surrounded by sunshine, even when she was too sick to go outside. Now the cancer was again attacking her body. With the help of a cane and my grandfather’s steady hand, they went to church every morning. But my grandmother grew steadily weaker until, finally, she could not leave the house anymore. For a while, Grandpa went to church alone, praying for God to watch over his wife.

Then one day, what we all dreaded finally happened. Grandma was gone.

“SHMILY”…. There it was again—scrawled in bright yellow ink on the pink ribbons of my grandmother’s funeral bouquet. As the crowd thinned and the last mourners turned to leave, my aunts, uncles, cousins, and other family members came forward and gathered around Grandma one last time.

Grandpa stepped up to my grandmother’s casket and, taking a shaky breath, he began to sing to her very softly. Through his tears and grief, the old song came, a deep throaty lullaby. Shaking with my own sorrow, I will never forget that moment. For I knew that, although I couldn’t begin to fathom the depth of their love, I had been privileged to witness its unmatched beauty.

“S-h-m-i-l-y ————- See How Much I Love You!”

EDIT** A lot of people know of this story--this is not my orginal writing, nor is this story of my grandparents.  However, we can all keep SHMILY alive!

49 comments:

Courtney said...

What a beautiful post and what a beautiful story!

Christine said...

This is so sweet! You are very lucky to have had such wonderful grandparents!!

Shell said...

I have tears in my eyes from reading that.

Brittany said...

This post really touched me. I will only be lucky enough to find such a love like that in my life. It reminds me of my grandparents as well. They always steal kisses. It's so cute. I really enjoyed reading that. I'm sorry about your grandmother.

I love you new blog layout though! Super cute :)

as Mr. and Mrs said...

I loved this story! Reminds me I need to do something a little extra for my hubby :)

Paige said...

Such a beautiful post! I have tears and cold chills, so sweet.

Kendra Loisel said...

That was such a nice post. My heart goes to you. I still have all my grandparents except one who passed before my time. I can only imagine the hurt. I am glad you picked up on their game. It is the cutest little thing.!

Tia said...

That is such a sweet story- it brought tears to my eyes!
Your new blog layout looks great!

~*Katie*~ said...

My husband's parents did this for YEARS!!!! I have tried to do it, but I can never think of good places to put the note...

Erin said...

That story gave me chills! It made me want to start a tradition like that of my own.

The Wife said...

What a great story!

Jody said...

What a beautiful post of a wonderful story. When reading it got me a bit teary eyed. Thanks for sharing.

Anita said...

What a beautiful post! TFS!

Mrs. D said...

Simply beautiful! I'm so sorry for your loss.

Lil Landy said...

aw, that's so sweet. I love it!

capperson said...

This brought tears to my eyes. My grandparents have a love like this and I hope to one day have a love like theirs also. The steal kisses and my grandma tells me those exact things about my grandaddy and the wil play pinch each other and pat each others knees upunder the table when one's being silly, they are always being silly, they say their prayers before every meal, and they call each other cute little pet names. They are the cutest couple and I hope to one day have a love like theirs.

Holly Sails said...

What an amazing, wonderful story. Like something out of a movie really.

Kmama said...

Ahh, yes, tears here too!

sHp said...

That about had me in tears! Wow. Great story - thank you so much for sharing!!! Love your new blog design!!! I'm still struggling to find exactly what I want - hopefully I'll find it soon! Hope you're having a great night :)

Melissa said...

I like the new look of the blog! Very cool!

Rebecca said...

Just started following recently and wow...great post.

Laura@Cowboy Boots said...

ok i just balled tear and snot all over my computer! ha ha
what a lovely story! i'm glad you shared it b/c i've never heard that b4
i can't wait to do a SHMILY to my husband....
i usually leave him 'business trip notes' he never has business trips so i leave him special notes in his sock drawer and in his car or by his keys....i think the shmily is adorable!

Ily said...

I LOVE this story!! I can't wait to put up my first SHMILY! :)

ModernMom said...

A beautiful story...

Annie said...

make me want to cry! lots n lots of tears!!
what a beautiful love story.
thanks for sharing, i love it.

Julianna said...

Wow, love it. That was such a beautiful story. I can't wait to start a little tradition of my own. Thanks for following! I'll be following you too. Yay for the Juli's!

Working Mommy said...

I am giving you an award over on my blog :)

~WM

qandlequeen said...

It's a beautiful story!

Have to admit, though, I was expecting a shmily scribble in the dust after she left. Ghostly expectations and all. But still a good story and great reminder to us all that love is enduring.

Lizzard said...

this is SUCH a beautiful story!

April said...

Such a sweet reminder! Love your new look and enjoying this cute blog of yours! :o)

Kassie said...

I love this story! I remember reading it in a Chicken Soup for the Soul book ages ago and thinking that when I get married that's what I want. :) It stuck with me all that time!

Sherrie said...

That was so neat to read. I may have to implement it. :) And -- I love your makeover as well! Very nice!

Robyn{Lee} said...

Oh I LOVE this, AND I love that quote! I believe in unconditional, enduring love. It DOES exist, but takes a powerful leap of faith to find. : ) Thanks for sharing this story, I myself had never read it.

Elizabeth Marie said...

That quote is my ABSOLUTE favorite...and this story brought tears to my eyes.

~BeautyBeau~ said...

Beautiful :) It shows us all we should cherish our loved ones!

Brandon Neal said...

I loved this post. Im getting married this May...I think I am going to look to start little games like this...keep things fun around the house.

Theta Mom said...

What a beautiful post! Just found you from Finding Trinity...following on twitter and look forward to blogging with you!

The Mrs. said...

I LOVE THIS!!

Kristin said...

Deep all consuming love. What's better than that? Beautiful post!

Girl About Business said...

I read a similar story a few years ago in a magazine, maybe Cosmo. Anywho, this young woman told the story of her relationship with her fiance and how they'd leave SHMILY notes all over the place. The fiance went out of town with a few friends, and was killed on their way back home. And I believe the girl found a note in the glove compartment of her car from her fiance that read "SHMILY'. It was a very touching story, very similar to this one. So yes, we should all share SHMILY notes with those that we love!

Kristen said...

I love this story & this post. Thanks so much for sharing!

Niks La Mode. said...

OMG so beautiful!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Heather Martin said...

LOVE THIS! I think I am going to start doing this. I would leave notes for my fiance on the bathroom sink before I left for work but this is such a great thing to do!

Just Breathe said...

What a precious story. Thank you for sharing.

Daisy said...

I LOVE LOVE LOVE that quote!!! And fantastic story - thanks for sharing!! :) xo

Andrea said...

I've read that story before in a James Dobson devotional book for couples. It is a great one!

Lisa said...

I love this story and it always brings a tear to my eye.
I'm from Shell's dropping in to say hello!

Cole said...

I'm dropping by from Shell's blog. I've never read this story but it is so lovely and touching. Thank you for sharing!

Sherri said...

There is nothing I love more than love itself.. I love this story! I love your blog and I am so glad I found it! I am going to post this adorable story on my blog and I will make sure link it to yours so others can find your awesomeness!